yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

S-M-I-T-H!

In 58 days, I'm going to be marrying this man!

And becoming Mrs. Smith!

(oh, and all my dreams of never having to spell my last name were crushed yesterday when I was on the phone with someone, trying to reserve hotels rooms for the "Smith Wedding-Party")

Hotel: "What is the name of the party?"
Me: "Smith"
Hotel: "Schmitt?"
Me: "No, SMITH!"
Hotel: "Schmitt?"
Me: "No, Smith: S-M-I-T-H!"


(But, I've never been happier to spell a last name.....!!)

taxes!

Hello tax-season! Hello turbo-tax!
(exclamation-marks do not necessarily denote genuine excitement.)


So, while using the helpful services of TurboTax yesterday...I kept getting barraged by ads to "upgrade" (aka: pay) for these helpful online tools.



Please see below:

and a little closer-up:


Now, I realize that I'm a designer...and I posses a certain amount of artistic skills (and therefore may be a little biased) BUT WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT!? Genetically-modified, gray-oval-head cows? And a face-less, umbrella-toting ghost?

TurboTax, you're trying to tell me that it pays to be prepared...?
Well, I'm telling you that it pays to hire....well....people who can actually draw cows.



yikes.

is it wrong...

....that I think this is genius?

"A guerilla campaign for Superette is leaving quite an impression (haha) on New Zealanders. By putting indented plates across the inner city and fashion district bus stops, mall seats and park benches, those who sat down wearing short shorts or skirts walked away with an ad campaign imprinted on the back of their legs."


Maybe it's because I work in the marketing-world, or maybe it's because I'm sick of swaddling all of my body in multiple layers of stockings and scarves...but this has definitely just made my day.

(And makes me dream of wearing shorts again.)

you call this a THIN?

I found this in my box of WheatThins.

Let me introduce you to the....

WheatTHICK.

(pictured on the right is a normal cracker. On the left....well...a WheatThick.)

*also, note to self: don't try eating an awkardly-thick WheatThin. It was disgusting.

poor pup

My dear friend Amy recently wrote about an unfortunate nail-clipping experience she had...which made me immediately cringe with the memory of my own very-similar incident.

Fortunately, mine did not involve a small-human (like her’s did)...
UNfortunately, mine did involve a whole lot more blood...

(if you get queezy reading about the red-stuff...stop reading now.)

So, the story begins with our precious little pup, Piper. (I use the term “our” somewhat loosely here, since the dog is actually my sister’s)....But, we live together- so by default I have kindof adopted the pooch. Maybe this would be considered something along the lines of common-law dog-ownership?

Anyways, this dog (as cute and as well-behaved as she may be) DOES NOT LET YOU CUT HER NAILS!!!!
And if you know anything about dog-ownership (and the coinciding requirements of dog-grooming), you’ll know that nail-cutting is a vital component of dog-maintenance.

So, since Piper has been winning all of our attempted nail-cutting battles lately- I decided to be the nice big-sister/faux-dog-owner...and do a little sneaky snip-snip.

FAIL.

Well, I should clarify: the sneaky-part worked. The snipping-part worked.....a little too well....
(and the fact that Piper was napping smack-dab in the middle of Karen’s white bedspread only compounded the issue)

Soooo....immediately after making the fatal-snip, blood begins to GUSH from this poor little puppy’s paw. (I swear I didn’t hurt her, because she didn’t even make a peep.) However, as I saw a growing puddle of blood on Karen’s bed, I knew that I had to act...fast!

There is no way for me to explain the amount of blood squirting from this dog’s paw...it was everywhere...! Rushing her to the bathroom resulted in a blood-trail through the house, and as I tried to “rinse” her paw...all of her flailing-attempts to escape the water caused blood to splash on the sink, on the mirror, on the walls....(and I kid you not)...the CEILING.

I had to do a quick google search: “how to stop your dog from bleeding to death from nail-clipping”, I was told to put a compress on the paw, and wrap it in ace-bandages, so that it won’t get infected...or start to bleed again. (uhhhm, and maybe normal people have a steady supply of ace-bandages on hand at all times, but not this house.) So, next-best thing? A sock?

So I quarantined bloody-sock-Piper and myself to the bathrooom for almost an hour...(because I wasn't about to let her bloody-up any other part of our house...)




BUT here is your take-away from this potentially tragic-story.
(well, besides not sneaking up on dogs and clipping nails)

This is the magical-solution to get blood out of ANYTHING!!

• 1 teaspoon dishwashing-soap.
• 1 cup hydrogen-peroxide.

Mix together and spoon onto surface, pat dry, and continue to apply until stain COMPLETELY DISAPPEARS!
(I kid you not...this formula is pure magic.) *also works on wine-stains.

So, I then proceeded to spend the rest of the afternoon with a mug of “magic-clean-up-blood-formula” and a little sponge...dabbing carpets, and couches, and rugs, and bedspreads, and towels, and pretty much everything we own....


And I have sworn off cutting another dog-nail for the rest of my life.
The end.

(best attempt at a sock-bandage?)

(I may have mauled her...but she still loves me.)

sortof.

wish-list:

I feel like this mug would be super-practical for my lifestyle....



maybe a little creepy?...but hey. I'm all about functionality.

chilly-bird

one down....51 to go! (pic-a-week)

hello 2011

2010 was a real doozy of a year.
Bring on 2011...

(also, as annoying as it is to have a birthday smack-dab in the middle of Christmas and NewYears...it does make for a nice start to the new year. You can combine "newyear's resolutions" with "getting-older-resolutions")

errrr...unfortunately, I'm not quite sure what my resolutions are for 25, and 2011? but I think I would at least like to include "making more art" on the list of 2011-self-improvements. Soooo, in the spirit of lofty January-aspirations, we'll shoot for one-piece-a-week. (I'm a sucker for somewhat-uninspiring yet highly-achievable goals.)




oh, also on a mostly-unrelated note: for those of you who have had to endure years of my gasoline-speeches (and the supremacy of Chevron over other gases)...I would just like to point out the first person to congratulate me on my turning a quarter-century:

(that's right: Chevron. Loyalty pays off)

I'm sorry...but, if you've spent any time at all in the church worship/music-circle....you too will find this movie a bit humorous.




my favorite scene:

"WINNER: Papyrus Font Awards"

a little visual treat.

this is how Karen and I fished when we lived in Indonesia.

Step #1. snorkle-mask. (best to be worn outside of the water too. Obviously.)
Step #2. obtain smaller trashcan for scooping fish.
Step #3. obtain giant trashcan to hold caught fish.
Steph #4. dive into lake and scoop up fish.

(*surprisingly, our methods were eerily successful?)

too much....

Sometimes life just gets a little crazy.
(and right now I think life has just dealt me the "lot-of-crazy" hand.)


want to see who I hang out with these days?
little pumpkin.


(*fortunately my studio-window is just her height.)

yiiiiiikes!

It is exactly for reasons like this that I feel legitimized for my fear of sleeping in houses alone.


um, hello. I don't care if you're cold. STAY OUT OF MY BED!

...unless you look like this little muffin.

(but still...only on special occasions)

ewww.

Do you know what I was doing exactly one week ago?

Oysters.
I was eating OYSTERS!?
SERIOUSLY...why do people eat those things?


I was emailed this photo by my dear friend Julia, who decided to commemorate the moment with a cellphone picture. (...so that way I could always remember the horrors of my first slurped-up-shellfish.)

*shivers*

Do I look petrified? ...because I am.
And please notice very (non-supportive/smirking) boyfriend in the foreground.

Come on.....if you ate this, you'd be making that face too!





{YIKES!}

Ah HAH!

My dad works a mysterious rotational job overseas, where he's gone for a month at a time.
My friends hear about this, and usually decide that he works undercover for the CIA.
(I can't say that I can really argue)

Until I was watching TV the other day....



and NOW I know what my father does in his mysterious months "at work"







He's really Anthony Bourdain!!
(agree?)

nana

if my last post was about babies...obviously the logical thing to write about next would be grandmas.

(*in my case: this would be a nana)

My nana belongs to the part of society that is still a bit skeptical about all this new crazy technology happening everywhere...unfortunately, we have no mercy, and we force it upon her.
A few weeks ago, my parents flew out to see her, bought her a computer, and set her up an email account.

this is an excerpt from the gem of a letter I got from her a few days ago:

Hi Leslye,
I really do not have much to say. I hope you are alright and the snow is not getting you down. I went tochurch today . They were having a pot Luck fund raiser for the choir. I did not want to cook anything ,so I looked at fruit and cakes at the store yesterday. I decided on a carrot cake. There are alot of Philippino people in this church now and I never know what to eat. Any way I had a plate full.It all tasted good. It sure was nice of your Mom and Dad to get me this compute4r, even though I did not want them to. Now your Mom is pushing me to use it. I hope I am not boring you. Even my typing is bad these days. Thank heaven for the spelling check.

Bye for now. I Love You! Happy Valentines Day.
Love, Nana

my favorite part is definitely the philippino food at the potluck.






ooooooh, she's a funny one...

...babies...?

I'm an aunt.

And don't freak out. Karen's not having a kid.... I'm just a fake-aunt,
(*which is definitely the next-best thing)




and who's made me into such a lucky lady?

....meet Bennett:

Isn't he just a little pumpkin? And he's even wearing the little whale-shirt I made him...!


...

...



(*but, you see: this is what happens when your friends have children, and you have to live vicariously through them with itty-bitty-crafting desires)

{elephants}

{whales}

so...let me know if you want me to be your fake-aunt too. (I'm kindof fan of this auntie-ness!)

wanna be a font-nerd?

yeah, thought you did.

soooo, you should take this test.

it combines shooting, and typography. what more could a girl want!?

do you see that? they called me a "true font geek". I think that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me...

snoooowpocalypse!

(or at least that's what they've been calling the 2 feet of snow that we got hit with on Friday night)
and it seems fitting: snowpocalypse.


But, (instead of hunkering down under blankets and hot cocoa), do you want to see what I was doing friday night during all of this crazy-mad-snowiness?

{this}

...which means i got stuck on the opposite side of pittsburgh for 2 days. (woops!?)

and woke up to a world of this.
...2 feet of snow, in one night? crazy.

and we're supposed to get another 10 inches today.

(they called in the national guard. no joke. because they don't know what to do with all of it....)




oooooh, winter.......

office inventory

This is what I stare at for approximately 8 hours every day.
(and in case you're wondering: YES that is a picture of a stick in my photoshop window.)
Don't ask...


This is what I drink for approximately 8 hours every day.
(decaf. don't worry.... I try to stay away from the office-caffine-jitters)
So, nothing too interesting or out of the ordinary, right?
Well....we haven't hit the drawers yet.


...


...



...let me show you mine:

{Drawer #1}

Drawer #1 isn't too odd...I mean, sure there's enough tea in there to supply an average american family for a year.. (and a coupon for more tea) ..but, that's not too embarrassing, right?

{Drawer #2}

shameful: two potatoes and a gift certificate for an hour-long massage.

WHO AM I!??!?!?!?.........