sooo, a few months ago - (in the height of my "coupon-craze") - i signed up for some "Kraft-Kitchen"-something-or-other (in order to get a coupon, for cheese(?) maybe...) Anyways, now i'm on the Kraft-Kitchen's weekly mailing-list (blast. because I forgot to sign up using my specially created "coupon-junk-mail-address")
so- last week, Kraft sent me some little treasures: "A dozen ways to make a ground-beef dinner." (Or something like that?) And of course I was absolutely thrilled...(because, we all know I tend to eat an exorbant amount of ground beef.) *not.
but, out of curiousity? or boredom? (or both) I decided to click through their little slideshow....(who knows? i may have a sudden change of heart and begin consuming ravinously carnivorous amounts of ground beef)....and i was APPALLED.
(and felt forced to share)
so, please meet some of the highlights of Kraft's 2009 Ground-Beef Brigade:
{opening slide}
*great shot. raw. meat. bloody. perfectly-rounded-rectangle.
also. doesn't Kraft know you should not be combining raw meet with fresh produce?
(PEOPLE: this is how mad-cow happens....)
*great shot. raw. meat. bloody. perfectly-rounded-rectangle.
also. doesn't Kraft know you should not be combining raw meet with fresh produce?
(PEOPLE: this is how mad-cow happens....)
{first temptrous-meal}
*maybe it's just me...but, this looks a bit too much like something just up and died (in chunky-crumbles) on a bun. and then slathered itself in melted american-cheese. (out of those individually-wrapped plastic sleeves.)
shudder....
*maybe it's just me...but, this looks a bit too much like something just up and died (in chunky-crumbles) on a bun. and then slathered itself in melted american-cheese. (out of those individually-wrapped plastic sleeves.)
shudder....
{it gets better}
*as if just meatloaf weren't enough...lets swaddle it in bacon (and pretend not to notice the definite yellow-undertones of the loaf)
*as if just meatloaf weren't enough...lets swaddle it in bacon (and pretend not to notice the definite yellow-undertones of the loaf)
{grand finale}
*just in case you're not thinking it yet, i'm gonna say it:
poo. carrots. wrapped in lettuce.
*just in case you're not thinking it yet, i'm gonna say it:
poo. carrots. wrapped in lettuce.
3 comments:
Haha! I love this. I never would have given them second thought. Because I love ground beef. But reading your commentary is hilarious. And I agree with some of it. The poo and carrots wrapped in lettuce is a bit disgusting (did they not think about how warm lettuce gets all wilty? Is that supposed to be finger food?). But I could totally go for a cheesy sloppy joe right now.
hehe :)
oh my... I'm probably a border-line beef eater... and these really did not make me want to eat much beef. How funny.
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